eMoTioNaL mE...

DISAPPOINTED
Believe it or not, I am still trying to get my confidence back after years of its non-existence. You knew about this. When I shared some parts of my life with you, it was with trust that you won't put me down or even pull me down. I wanna go back to who I was before. I wanna be genuinely happy and not just be someone who shows a jolly face. I expected you to know these things, to understand. But was I wrong to assume such things? Is it wrong to trust this way?

FRUSTRATED
I'm slowly losing my passion for music. And that worries me. My days have become routinary. I wake up, go to the office, walk around the mall, go home, sleep. In the past, I am always able to find time to play with my guitar or listen to the radio. But I can't play with my guitar now. I gave it to my cousin (can't take it back!). Instead of turning my radio on, I turn on the television, which I am able to set the timer to sleep after 2 hours. I know I should do something about it. I don't want to lose that passion. It's probably the only one I've got. But I just can't stop myself from falling asleep... ZzZzz...

SAD
I'm no good with goodbyes. I have said a lot of goodbyes in the past, some even permanently. There's no getting used to it.

THANKFUL
Having done so many mistakes, I'm glad to have been given as many chances. So thankful to have made it through, thankful to still be here. Thankful for the overwhelming love that embrace me everyday.

HOPEFUL AND CONFIDENT
He has not made us for nought; He has brought us thus far, in order to bring us further, in order to bring us on to the end. He will never leave us nor forsake us; so that we may boldly say, "The Lord is my Helper; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me." We "may cast all our care upon Him who careth for us." What is it to us how our future path lies, if it be but His path? What is it to us whither it leads us, so that in the end it leads to Him? What is it to us what He puts upon us, so that He enables us to undergo it with a pure conscience, a true heart, not desiring anything of this world in comparison of Him? What is it to us what terror befalls us, if He be but a hand to protect and strengthen us? (--John Henry Newman)

With God as my guide, I know I'll never lose my way.

The past 2-3 weeks had been emotional for me. There were days I got confused as to how I should feel. I'm glad they're over. Every day is a day to look forward to.